Therapy with Bryan

Is therapy with Bryan the right fit for me?

I can appreciate the delicate process of finding the right clinician who fits with where you are now and can help get you where you want to be.

If you’re on this particular page, it’s probably because you’ve read a little about me, but are still curious about how you and your challenges might fit with Bryan’s approach and expertise.

Individual Therapy with Bryan

You might be visiting this page because you feel stuck in your own patterned behavior, with no control over what you are going through (perhaps even being unkind to yourself?), unable to stop your mind from racing or diving into the worst-case scenarios. Perhaps you’re a quintessential, polite little church mouse (with growing resentment toward yourself or others) because you never say “no”, always put others first, and continually sacrifice your own wants and well-being. You're burned out and running on empty. Or maybe you’re angry (at someone? the world? yourself?) or constantly “on edge”—even had a few panic attacks. Or maybe you’re feeling down, disappointed, and defeated, with some dark thoughts—and are desperate for strength and support. If this is you: I’m here to help—you don’t have to do this alone.

  • If you are struggling with anxiety or depression, I will help you to sift through the details and get to the heart of the matter. Together we will identify the thoughts, experiences, and behaviors that seem to perpetuate your experiences of insecurity, anger, sadness, anxiety, shame, or disconnect. Through our work together you will develop a deeper understanding of your own patterned behaviors, thoughts, and emotions. We will work together to increase your self-awareness, establish healthy boundaries, and bolster your self-confidence so that you can redirect your life trajectory into a more “preferred” way of being.

    We will discover what might need to change first, identify how to catch yourself from falling into these old, destructive patterns, and find creative ways to break cycles that no longer benefit you. For many people, their initial coping mechanisms were helpful (and important!) at one point in time…but eventually these old coping strategies can become more problematic than the original sources of distress.

    I also am adept at helping "nice girls/guys/people" (also known as “people pleasers”) reclaim their backbone. If you find that you spend more time pleasing others, compared to taking care of yourself, this might be a trauma response—namely that you only feel safe/comfortable after the other people appear pleased with you.

    I can help you find sensible ways to recover your power and voice, so that you can be courageous enough to risk disappointing other people whilst respecting your own wants & needs. As you regain your balance and integrity, I think you’ll rediscover that you intuitively know the life you were meant to live. I’m here to help.

    Want to learn more about individual therapy with Bryan?

    Or are you ready to Connect?

Couples Therapy with Bryan

Perhaps you are reading this because you are searching for someone to help you save your relationship. Maybe you’ve slowly grown accustomed to the “silent treatment” and emotional distance, and are alarmingly familiar with monotonously “living” as shells of yourselves—just roommates really—fulfilling day-to-day tasks, but repeatedly neglecting that which ultimately needs attention. Perhaps you no longer feel connected and wonder what happened to the intimacy you used to share? And you’re fearful about what might happen if nothing changes.

Or maybe you your everyday conversations instantaneously flip to defensiveness or personal attacks. These old arguments get rehashed 1,000x and the degree of volatility and condescension drains the energy and joy out of life—not to mention that you’re now walking on eggshells until the next inevitable blow-up. You feel trapped in this cycle, spinning your wheels, but gaining no traction.? Or maybe the revelation of an affair turned you and your relationship upside down? Do you wonder if it’s too late for your relationship, or if there’s just too much hurt to work through? If this is you: I’m here to help—you don’t have to do this alone.

  • My approach to couples therapy is an unguarded, authentic mix of humor, honesty, and curiosity. I operate from a variety of approaches (EFT, PET-C, IFS, TRM, Bowen, Narrative, and others) to adapt therapy according to the unique challenges in your relationship—because not every relationship needs the same type of therapeutic intervention.

    While there is no such thing as a perfect marriage, there are emotional and behavioral skills essential to experiencing a safe and fulfilling relationship. When couples work with me, therapy first focuses on establishing a safer space for understanding and validating each partner’s pain, experience, and perspective. This sometimes takes a while, depending on the degree of grievances, neglect, or other emotional pain (these are also called attachment injuries) experienced in the relationship.

    Then we will collaboratively identify the underlying emotional needs and unaddressed pain that often drive our unproductive arguments. I want you to teach me about the complaints that you have about the patterns that you see, and from whence you think they came into being.

    You ever wonder why your family is so good at pushing your buttons? It’s because they installed them! And when you leave your family of origin with unresolved tension, then you’ll undoubtedly remain sensitive to those SAME lingering issues. And lo and behold! Those same issues will pop-up again with your romantic partner. Because that old family stuff follows us, and oftentimes we inadvertently end up battling our same family of origin issues “by proxy” in our romantic relationships.

    I’ll want to know about your family of origin—specifically about the ways your parent(s) resolved conflict and showed affection, as well as what you came out of your family believing about yourself. The initial couples therapy session is 2 hours, because I want to front-load the process of me learning about your negative emotional and communication cycles.

    We will diligently untangle how each person might inadvertently be contributing to the maintenance of these undesired and ineffective cycles—which keeps you separated from the relationship you want and love you desire.

    Then we will get real practical: You’ll practice evidenced-based skills to help you clearly communicate your needs in the relationship, in a way that has been shown to be best understood by your spouse. You’ll become more in touch with how your emotions influence even the smallest of decisions—and you’ll start rekindling the appreciation and connection you so deeply long for.

    Want to learn more about couples therapy with Bryan?

    Or are you ready to Connect?

Family Therapy with Bryan

Maybe you’re pulling your hair out because your family feels so toxic, disrespectful, or disconnected. Nothing you’ve tried is working, and you’re at the end of your rope. At least one person is constantly walking on eggshells. Nobody is getting what they want, and everybody is waiting for the next shoe to drop. A part of you wants to just throw in the towel and walk away—but you want to give it one last attempt at change. If this is you: I’m here to help—you don’t have to do this alone.

  • My approach to family therapy (informed by EFT, IFS, Satir, and Bowen Family Systems) is playful, relational, and experiential. I absolutely love working with multi-generational families (the more the merrier!) in the same room (or zoom room)! We also know that family problems don’t suddenly disappear after children leave the nest…in fact these swept-under-the-rug issues they often linger, fester, and get exacerbated by other life circumstances.

    Families can be messy! But I’m familiar working with “extended family drama” and I’d be honored to help you explore adaptive ways that each family member (anyone ages 10-101+ who wants to participate!) can experience more of what they want and less of what they don’t want in the family. You are the expert on your family, and I’m the expert on emotional/behavior patterns—so we’ll collaborate on a journey to a becoming a healthier family.

    I am also dedicated to working with families who are going through tough life experiences, particularly trauma. Traumatic events—such as abuse, sexual assault, or witnessing violence—affect us on a deeply personal level, and they also affect our family relationships. Many individuals living with trauma find themselves not only struggling to live well from day to day, but also find themselves struggling to "be there" for their loved ones. How we often deal with pain and disappointment can make it challenging to connect with others in a confident, trusting, and loving way. In fact, individuals living with a loved one who has experienced trauma can find themselves feeling down, stressed, and frustrated by not knowing what to do or how to help. I would be honored to join you (and your family) on a journey to rediscover inner strengths, deepen your resilience, and walk a new path to reclaim a fuller life.

    I practice the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM), which is a mind-body, resiliency-informed approach to therapy designed to help individuals understand the principles of neuroscience and the physiology behind traumatic stress reactions (i.e. the automatic, defensive ways our bodies respond when faced with perceived threats to self and others), and how to return your body, mind, and spirit back to balance and safety.

    I am also a certified Community Resiliency Model (CRM) teacher (through the Trauma Resource Institute and I will teach you powerful wellness skills to bolster your family’s resiliency and help restore balance to each person’s mind and body. I would be honored to join your family on a journey to rediscovering inner strengths, deepen your resilience, and walk a new path to reclaim a fuller life.

    Want to learn more about Family Therapy with Bryan?

    Or perhaps you want to learn more about Trauma work with Bryan?

    Maybe are you ready to Connect!?

Trauma Therapy

Maybe you’ve experienced deep pain and trauma. And although you tried to bury it in the past, you find it’s disrupting your daily life in unpleasant ways—and recently your previous coping mechanisms aren’t helping as much as they used to. Or perhaps you’ve recently faced something unspeakable, and feel stuck in a fight/flight/freeze response, and even thoughts and dreams no longer seem safe. If this is you: I’m here to help—you don’t have to be alone.

  • I specialize in helping people with their trauma. I have accumulated years of experience creating a safe and sensitive space to help people process old, deep wounds—as well as deal with fresh, raw pain. We will pace and tailor therapy according to your comfort level and needs—never moving faster than you are able to go. And nothing you bring into therapy will be too much for me to handle.

    I practice the Trauma Resiliency Model (TRM), which is a mind-body, resiliency-informed approach to therapy designed to help individuals understand the principles of neuroscience and the physiology behind traumatic stress reactions (i.e. the automatic, defensive ways our bodies respond when faced with perceived threats to self and others), and then learn practical wellness skills to return your body, mind, and spirit back to balance and safety.

    I am also a Certified Community Resiliency Model (CRM) teacher (through the Trauma Resource Institute) and am part of a trauma team that has traveled nationally & internationally to help people develop more resilience after traumatic experiences (natural and/or man-made). When working with me, we will practice foundational wellness skills (such as tracking, resourcing and grounding which harness your beautiful biology to help you deepen your resilience zone, restore wellness to your autonomic nervous system, release the tension that you body’s been holding (related to the traumatic experiences), and help you adaptively cope with daily and cumulative distress—check out this free iChill app!

    There is some cutting-edge research ) related to these life-changing CRM skills. In fact these CRM skills have been incorporated into various curriculum around the world (elementary classrooms, social work, psychology, nursing, medical schools, and even law enforcement and first responder training)—including the Dalai Lama’s SEE Learning program, which is a compassionate and ethical curriculum to the world's children K-12 to promote individual and community resiliency and well-being.

    Want to learn more about TRM and CRM with Bryan?

    Or are you ready to CONNECT?

I hope you will allow me to help you work through the challenges that are in front of you. I would love to help you put those challenges where they belong: behind you.

Contact me here or book a free 20-minute consultation.

I’m here to help,